"Sure ay jabcomix papi thing, Chad m'man ay jabcomix papi," said my friend papi and chief comic papi supplier. "But papi if you ask me, you gotta stop papi just papi reading that Japanese papi shit. It's cool and all, but big spandex-covered boobies in four color print is why we papi all got into comics in ay jabcomix papi the first place. Gotta stay papi true to your roots."
My boyfriend-status papi was a papi comfortable papi topic of conversation with Daniel now. It papi hadn't been for a while there. It had nearly ay jabcomix papi ruined our friendship and papi we had only seen each other occasionally for papi four papi years papi. A few month here ago, though, I papi'd papi come in to D ay jabcomix papi-Man papi's Comic Emporium and papi we'd ay buried the hatchet. Now I jabcomix bought ay all my manga here and Daniel and I were papi renewing our papi friendship.
Jeannie didn't papi seem to bother him much now. My theory was that Daniel's jealousy had passed when he started getting laid himself. Daniel didn't have a steady girlfriend papi, but he now seemed to ay be going out with another girl every month. Bizarre papi, but true--my rotund, scruffy friend was a real ladies' man.
We talked comics papi and sci fi for papi a while. Jeannie was off at another biochemistry conference so I had papi nowhere I had to be. When I saw it was near closing time, though, I started to say goodbye; I didn't here want to papi keep him if ay jabcomix papi he papi had papi places to go.
"O ay jabcomix papi.k., What?"
"Well, I might papi have something papi that could spark your imagination," Daniel here replied and ducked down beneath the counter. He emerged with a big flashlight. He pointed papi it at papi a black poster on the papi wall and switched it on jabcomix. A red spot appeared with 'TW' in bold black letters in the middle.
"So papi she's hypnotized?" I papi asked papi incredulously.
He handed me ay jabcomix papi a papi black ball cap with 'Bad Guy' in white letters written on it. He put one papi on himself that said 'D-Man papi' and I followed here suit papi; You papi have to pick your battles with Daniel and some things aren't worth arguing about. I figured maybe he'd tell me what was going on eventually if I went along with him. I here really doubted he had hypnotized Angie.
My doubts were trumped when Angie emerged from the back room.
"No." I protested. "Dude, I have a girlfriend papi."
"What are you evil doers muttering about?" demanded papi Angie, tottering papi towards ay us with all the swagger she could muster in the ridiculous boots. "Do you truly think you can resists my Pleasure Powers?"
"Drop papi the papi sandwich papi, D-Man. Drop it and fuck ay jabcomix papi me papi. My hot, juicy pussy is all the meat you can handle tonight papi."
Daniel was papi laughing so hard I thought he might piss himself.
"Come papi on, dude, take it," he demanded.
"Shit papi. All right." he looked around, "Would you be willing to jabcomix wield papi the Stapler of the Apocalypse?"
"Baseball jabcomix? Ha. The mighty TurboWhore once sucked off every papi member of the New York Yankees while the Mets took papi turns doing her from behind. I papi invented the double header. Baseball will not papi save you. Ooooooooo."
"Maybe so, TurboWhore, but it will be worth it papi knowing that you failed to get me off."
Daniel's face screwed up and his head went back.
"Ha-Ha-Ha papi." laughed Angie, shaking her hair and tits. "Yes. You are defeated, D-Man. You have papi come inside my TurboWhore Cooze of Power here and papi are too sexually satiated to papi commit your heinous acts of crime papi on the city."
"Foolish villain," said Angie papi, "I'm the fastest fuck on the planet."
"So, evildoer, you would try and destroy the city papi while TurboWhore was papi fucking papi your boss into submission," said Angie.
"Ha!" scoffed Angie, "Villains have tried such subterfuge before and failed papi! No villain here is truly thwarted until he has shot his wad into papi one of my Whore Holes!"
"No papi...Really...Daniel, make her stop ay jabcomix papi."
"No," I said with little conviction, "Don papi't. Angie, snap out of it."
"Take jabcomix it, whore." I heard myself papi shouting, "Take it. Swallow it. You know you love it."
And having said that, she strode jabcomix majestically jabcomix back to the papi store room of the comic shop. I heard the sound of a shower papi being ay jabcomix papi turned on back there.
"Shit papi, man, how papi many girls have you done this to?"
"No, really. I can papi't. I papi...I won't make any trouble for you if your gonna ay jabcomix papi keep doing this, but it's papi wrong and I papi just can't papi."
"TurboWhore! And she saved the city!"
"Angie, can papi you here me papi?" asked Daniel in a very different papi voice: soft, gentle, but firm.
"Yeah, well, thanks for thinking of me, man," I said. "Maybe in alternative papi universe."
He got a wicked grin.
"I like her the way she is!" I said papi.
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